Do you believe you can truly control emotions like anger or sadness? We sometimes encounter discussions on anger management. While the intention to learn such methods often stems from a desire for emotional control, it seems many still find themselves struggling, even after their studies.
The Chasm Between Thought and Feeling
The misconception that a single solution can resolve all problems can sometimes exacerbate our struggles. However, as I wrote in the previous article, "You Can Transform," we do not possess entirely original thoughts; rather, we are influenced by countless others. The disparity between these ingrained thought patterns and our authentic self often gives rise to emotional issues. The anger or sadness we experience can, at times, stem from emotions we mistakenly believe are our own. To 'control' emotions, then, becomes an act of further suppressing them with our thoughts. While this might offer temporary containment, eventually, when capacity is exceeded, an explosion becomes inevitable.
The Emotions That Arise Are Not "You"
So, what should we do with the emotions that surface? Before answering that, there's something vital to understand. If your thoughts are not entirely your own, then the emotions stemming from them are not entirely yours either. When a feeling of anger wells up, it does not mean you are angry. Rather, the emotion of anger exists within you, and you are simply observing it.
Ways to Release Emotional Energy
Once you acknowledge the presence of anger within you, the next step is to "release" it. Emotions that arise simply must be discharged. Additionally, there’s another crucial point: releasing emotions is distinct from unleashing that emotional energy onto others. If you indiscriminately project your emotional energy onto someone else, you risk being consumed by the emotion itself. You become synonymous with the feeling, becoming a slave to both thought and emotion.
There are safe ways to release emotional energy. In Unfolding Bodywork sessions, we share specific exercises with those who need them. These are simple practices that anyone can integrate into their daily life without great effort, supporting you in living without accumulating emotions. Unnecessary emotional energy is like waste. By removing this unwanted clutter from the house of your body, you create space. Without that space, positive energy cannot well up.
Emotions Stored in the Body
Let me briefly touch upon the connection between the body and emotions. We live in a society where expressing emotions in public is often discouraged. For instance, there's an unspoken rule against crying in front of others. When emotions surface, we tend to swallow them or brush them aside. But what happens to these unexpressed emotions? They remain within the body, manifesting as physical tension or various symptoms. During an Unfolding Bodywork session, when a client's physical tension spontaneously eases, emotions can emerge independently of their conscious will. We may not know the origin of these feelings; they could be decades old. While searching for the "reason" isn't always meaningful, the crucial point is that long-unexpressed emotions find their voice as the body relaxes. For example, the pectoralis minor muscles often tend to hold tension associated with sadness.
How Body Transformation Transforms Life
As emotions stored in the body are expressed, not only does the body transform, but life itself can shift. For instance, someone who has always been overly considerate and endured much may find themselves unable to hold back anymore. When they finally express themselves, they might discover, to their surprise, that their feelings are accepted, realizing they never needed to suppress them in the first place, or even find joy in expressing themselves. This is the fascinating aspect of Unfolding Bodywork, which doesn't focus on isolated parts.
Exploring Methods That Work for You
When you are troubled by a symptom, there isn't just one single method for improvement. If you are struggling with emotional or physical patterns and seeking a path forward, why not try Unfolding Bodywork? Come and experience the power of listening to your mind-body's truth, supported with empathy and without judgment.